Dear ,

Thank you for your support, prayers, notes, and messages to me in this season of grief. I am so grateful for the 3MMM team for taking care of many things while I've been away. I am slowly making my way back to work and tasks left behind or set aside in 2026. Thank you for your patience and if I have missed something important from you, let's reconnect soon! 

As we continue the journey of Lent this week, I want to offer a simple prayer practice. I've been teaching breath prayers for so long, I've forgotten where I first learned them, but I think it was from friends at the Upper Room. I'm grateful for Laura's idea last week to collect and send you ways support for your Lenten practice through the season. More of those ideas and inspiration are below!

For today, consider a breath prayer. 

Match words to your breath, then pray the prayer at any point through the day or night.

On your inhale breath, address God with a few words. 

For example: Loving Creator; God Our Father and Mother; Jesus Christ; Spirit of mercy; or Light of the World.  

On your exhale breath, ask for what you need.

For example: Have mercy on me; Protect your children; Walk with us; Lead my heart; or Shine your love.

Make a combination of addressing God and asking for what you desire or need that suits your theology and current situation. Write it down (a post-it note will do.) Then pray the prayer matching it to your breath throughout the day.  

If want additional ideas for Lenten practices, we have resources for you. Here’s a post from last year with five Lenten practices for responding to this moment. Ask yourself these three questions as you consider your plans for Lent. Check out these ideas for children and grownups as we all navigate the season.

Warmly, 

Eileen

Do you need a connection for 

your Lenten practice? 

It is not too late to join us. You can start today.

Join us weekdays in Lent and write your prayers and reflections in community. Meditate briefly each day. Use the daily writing prompts. Or write whatever you are called to write. Time in silent companionship. All as part of our amazing Writing Table community. You are not alone. 

The year-round Writing Table meets LIVE daily
9a ET // 8a CT // 7a MT // 6a PT

Lent @ WT meets LIVE daily 

10:30a ET // 9:30a CT // 8:30a MT // 7:30a PT 

Cost: $50 and a 50% discount for current Writing Table members.
Check your email for the code if you are a current WT member.

February 2, 2026

This morning I’m sharing a quick list of what I’m learning about spiritual care by taking care of my mama this year and especially in the past month. 

, I have been teaching pastoral and spiritual care for many years. I try always to ground it in my experiences of giving and receiving care. And I try to teach it experientially and ask students to pay attention to the full experience of care that is embodied, relational, emotional, and integrated. Both the positive and the negative experiences from my life and stories in the books and articles I share, inform my teaching. Experiential learning and practice are essential for spiritual care. What we do can be taught, but it can't be reduced to rules. Each new situation calls for its own pace, attention, and response. 

The past month I’ve been absorbed in giving care to my mom in the hospital and in hospice care, and this weekend a list started rolling around in my head. It is not a list of rules, but experiences that stand out in this long holy moment of my life and hers. It's kind of a 'notes to self' and 'remember this later' kind of list.

Here is what I'm learning about spiritual care through the experience of caring for my mama. 

1. Prioritize the person receiving care. It is so easy for everything else practical and emotional, medical and financial to jockey for the driver’s seat of attention, yet it is about the person – return to the person. Talk to them and ask them what they need. Prioritize their well-being. 
2. There is no end to cleaning.
3. Be kind to healthcare workers, and they are much more likely to return the kindness. A note of thanks with bagels and pastries once in a while is good, too.
4. Brush your teeth and go to bed early if you can – self care is very challenging to maintain. Prioritizing your own care is essential if you want to be able to prioritize the beloved person in your care. No either/or decisions here.
5. Crises come in pairs and triplets and quads. It’s rarely ever just one thing. See also: hospice care + ice storm x 8 days without power at home = exhaustion. Grateful for my spouse and partner Lynn who literally kept the home fires burning, kept the cats alive, and then got the third generator going. 
6. Talk about expectations with your fellow caregivers. Assuming gets everyone into trouble eventually. Just talk, even if it’s uncomfortable.
7. Soup goes down easy; and when made with love and care maybe even easier.
8. Hold hands. A lot. It seems to help with the unwinding. 
9. Go to the gym, walk outside, eat something green, put on some lip gloss, or get your nails done – the little routines and habits that keep you feeling like yourself. 
10. Praying takes a lot of forms ... changing a bed, sweeping the floor, doing the laundry, trimming fingernails, sending text updates, refilling the water cup, streaming soft guitar music, watching a movie together, asking questions then listening, waiting for the responses, gentle hugs every time you come and go. 

Bless you in all of your caregiving, . And I know some of you out there are learning the hard way what it is to receive care. May all the spiritual care in your life be mutual and a source of support and learning in practice. We are transformed into creatures of love when we practice giving and receiving love. May you know without any shadow of doubt that you are beloved. For when all else fails and life comes to a close, love remains. God’s love is here with us all along. Beginning to end. Let yourself know it all the way down. 

Let us continue to hold the Christ-light for each other.

Peace, 

Eileen

An Update from the 
New State of Clergy Report

As promised, we are sharing milestones and news related to the new State of Clergy Report as it becomes available. 

This week I want to tell you about growth and change for African American Baptist women in ministry. Our friends at Baptist Women in Ministry released a new "State of Women in Baptist Life" Report in December 2025. It includes findings about Baptist women pastors and clergy. One of the exciting parts of the report comes from the North Carolina General Baptist State Convention. This group is approximately the same size in terms of numbers of churches and ordained leaders as the Cooperative Baptist Fellowship. 

In 2013 women were estimated to be less than 1% of the pastors in Black Baptist churches across multiple denominations. In 2025 the SWBL report says 33 women are serving as pastors and co-pastors of GBST-NC churches. That means they are pastoring 2.3% of the 1423 churches. This is just one state in one historic Black Baptist denomination. Such encouraging news! 

If you want to know more about the revised and expanded State of Clergy Report that is currently under construction, please stop by and read more here:  

What changes have you witnessed for women and 

lgbtiq leaders in your denomination?

We welcome your input as we continue researching the next State of Clergy report. What would you like to share?

• information
• stories
• data
• books
• articles
• blogs
• news reports 
• elections of bishops or other church leaders
• conferences and events
• people we should interview
• questions you must have answered! 

All contributions will be independently verified before including them in the report. 

Our question for you today: 

How am I praying today? Through the season of Lent? 

Remember, , what you do and who you are matters! I believe in you, and I hope you will let me know how I can support you!

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